I feel my mother in that star
Shining brightly from afar
Watching over me, this I know
My guardian angel with her special glow.
She comes to me each clear night
Calling me with her brilliant light
As I feel her warming my heart
I realize we’ve never really been apart.
I gaze up at her for a long while
Marveling at her with a smile
Close one eye and extend a finger
I hold her there and let it linger.
I silently tell her my joys, cares, and fears
She listens, laughs, and wipes away my tears
Then she wraps her arms around me so tight
And tells me how she loves me with all her might.
Soon our time for this night shall end
So a blow of a kiss or two I send
I tell her I love her too and can’t wait
To one day meet her at the pearly gate.
I feel my mother in that star
Shining brightly from afar
Watching over me, this I know
My guardian angel with her special glow.
Lori Anderson
© 5/6/2011
I wrote this poem for my mother, Nancy Seeton, for Mother's Day. There really is a certain star that calls me with it's bright light. I really do feel my mother in that star. I really do and feel all the things that I write about in this poem. My mother was murdered when I was just a baby, so I never got to know her. I have always had a strong bond with her and have always felt her presence near me and have always looked up to the stars to talk to her. One night, this particular star seemed to be begging for my attention and I felt my mother's presence like never before. I just stared at it for a long while. I closed one eye, and reached a finger up to cover the star, to touch her, and I could feel her embrace. Before I found this star, or I should say this star found me, I never really knew if she could hear me when I talked up at the stars to her. Now I know she can communicate with me through this star! There have been several occasions where I know she has. I will tell about one of them. One night, my husband and I were coming home from out of town on some back roads, a faster route. He was driving and I was gazing at my mother's star. I was talking to her and feeling her hold me. We came to a "T" in the road and he turned right. I got this strange feeling of a warning from my mother. I'd never received a warning from her and didn't know if it was real, but decided to er on the side of caution. After a very brief hesitation, I turned to Kyle, who knew I was spending time with my mother (when I see her I'll usually tell him "look, there's my mother" and then he knows I'm communing with her), anyway, I turned to him and said "Kyle, I want you to be very careful, I think my mother just told me there is a deer on the other side of that house up there that is fixing to run across the road". Kyle knows my bond with her and slowed down and was watching very carefully, and to our amazement, as we came upon the house, a deer was right where she said it was, running across the road! It was incredible!It was amazing! My mother really is my guardian angel!
My mother came to me through a song on my radio when I was 16. I didn't know it was her at first, in fact I didn't know it was her until the day after my 29th birthday! This story is so incredible I just have to tell it! ;) This is copied from an old "blog" on my myspace account...which I never get on anymore...so there is some background info on there. My mother was murdered when I was a baby. I was just barely a year old, and only by 2 or 3 weeks at that. My grandmother put my brother and I up for adoption (with the thoughts that we'd have a better life) and luckily we were adopted by the same family, so we were able to stay together. We always knew we were adopted, and even though I loved my new family (and still do), I started searching for my birth family when I was about 14 or so. It was a mission, a quest, it was something I HAD to do. It was a long drawn out process and I had very little information to go off of. I finally found my Uncle Dan and met him the day after my 29th birthday. He is 5 years younger than my mother and was her closest sibling. He gave me pictures of her (I had no idea what she looked like until this day), an old timey truck decanter (the only thing still around that she owned), and told me stories about her. I had so many questions. When I asked him what her favorite song was, he said "I don't remember the title or the artist, but it went "Where oh where can my baby be, the Lord took her away from me" and before he could get out anymore, I shouted out "Last Kiss by J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers!!!". He looked at me in amazement and asked "how in the world did you know that? That is such an old song." I told him about how when I was 16 and driving to work one day, I was flipping through the radio stations and I stopped on a station that was playing that song and I couldn't change it. It was really odd, I immediately started balling when I heard it. I became obsessed with the song and listened to that same station all the time trying to figure out what the name of it was and who the artist was. This was before you could just "google" it on the internet! About a year later I finally found the information I was looking for, bought the tape and played it over and over. Every time I would here it I would ball uncontrollably. I mean, I know that I'm a very emotional person and I know that it is a very sad song, but until the day I met my Uncle, I cried every time I heard it. So, back to the day I met my uncle...he told me that she loved that song and played the record all the time, including when I was a baby. So, now I know why I have such an emotional tie to that song. I must have subconsciously known that it was my mother's favorite song and it reminded my subconscious of her. Now I do own the CD version of the song and I still listen to it all the time. I don't cry every time I hear it though, I smile and I feel her presence. I truly believe that on that day, when I was 16 and I heard that song for the first time, my mother was trying to tell me hi, that she really is here for me, and that she loves me! ;)
She also came to me in a dream a few days after my first miscarriage. I was asleep and I heard a voice say "Lori, Nancy needs to talk to you." Then she appeared, in a long flowing gown, looking like an angel, and was holding a baby, my baby. I became so excited, I jumped up which woke me up, and they were gone. I know it was her telling me that everything was alright, that she had the baby and was going to take care of the baby until I could get there. Now she has all 3 of my babies. Poor Mother! She has her hands full now...but I know she is happy to have them! ;) It certainly brings me peace.
I've missed my mother (physically) my whole life. I think of her every single day. I've always wished she were still here with me. However, I have always felt very blessed to have such a strong emotional bond with her and such a strong spiritual relationship with her. I love you mother!
